Packers/Bears go both ways as a team

Packers and Bears stand, link arms before NFL game

All we can say is . . .*

“GRAB YOUR PARTNER AND D0-SI-DO; SWING HIM AROUND AND…

Allemande left partner, Allemande right corner, Allemande left partner, Allemande right corner.   . . .

And turn your corner upside down.
And turn your corner like swingin’ on a gate,
And meet your partner for a grand chain eight,
And hurry up boys and don’t be late.
Chew your tobacco and rub your snuff,
And meet your honey and strut your stuff.
Right foot up and a left foot down,
And make that big foot jar the ground,
And promenade your partner around.
Home little gal and don’t you know,
I like sugar in my coffee-o,
And meet your partner and prom- enade-o,
You can’t get catch a rabbit ‘til it comes snow.
And watch that bedbug fly on the wall,
And promenade your partners all.

HOW DO YOU PARODY THIS STUFF?

The Green Bay Packers are patting themselves on the, whatever, today. They’ve put down the firestorm players, managers, and owners in the NFL have created in recent weeks.

They’ve done the impossible; inspired by the Dallas Cowboys, the Packers have successfully figured out how to “have it both ways”.

For all those ‘white supremacists’, ‘nativists’, macho admirers of the military, and all the other deplorables, the Packers and their NFL colleagues compromised their “principled opposition” to their country and stood for the flag and the national anthem.

For the ‘homies, Black Lives Matter crowd, and assorted leftists of all kinds, they also happily linked their arms in “solidarity”.

Now, everybody’s happy, right?

Aaron Rodgers, Green Bay’s poet/ quarterback solemnly proclaimed that the team, the league, and the “family” was able to show with profound sincerity, those sacred values… equality, justice, love, and solidarity by linking arms.

Wow! Was that a great moment in sports history…or not ?!

Inspired by this, I am moved to imagine the speech that “Mr. Rogers” probably wanted to give, on behalf of his “teamies”, to introduce this momentous occasion:

After making their “bold concession” to stand for the national anthem, I can hear Aaron giving a ‘shout out’ for the” Kap” and inviting the fans to “come on down ” and link arms while a medley of tunes popular with various members of the Bears and Packers and NFL teams everywhere is played: the “Internationale”, The “Horst Wessel Song”, etc.

“I look forward to the day when this noble game of football can be played without helmets and shoulder pads, without referees and “trash talk”; when teams like the Bears and the Packers can come together without fear of concussions and meet on the field in friendly competition without the anxiety of score being kept, and, in January each year, the Super Bowl, which always ends in the agony of defat for one team, is replaced by a ceremony in which every player in the league receives a National Football League “Good Sportsmanship and Participation” ring.

“And now Packer fans, Bear fans, football fans of all teams, join us as Bob Costas leads the Chicago Bears’ defensive ‘front four’ in singing “We Are The World”, and various tunes from “Porgy and Bess”. ”

Don’t know who said it, maybe nobody but us, but “when you try to have it both ways, that’s how you’re going to get it!”:

I’m sorry that I said goodbye, people say I did the right thing but they don’t have to cry. I can love you for all the thing that you are, and then hate you for all the things that you’re not, I want you to go, I want you to stay, but I can’t have it both ways.”


DLH

*via Old Time Herald .org

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2 Responses to Packers/Bears go both ways as a team

  1. DLH says:

    A reader of this piece asked me if I thought that Aaron Rodgers was incredibly stupid, grievously naive, or amazingly disingenuous based on the comments the Green Bay quarterback has made the past week attempting to defend the actions of the anti-American ‘knee jerks’ on his team and others around the NFL.
    My answer to this individual was, no, I don’t think Aaron Rodgers is any of those things. I think he’s just wisely protecting himself. Remember, a primary responsibility of a football team’s offensive line is to protect the quarterback. How many unblocked ‘blind side’ hits do you think a NFL quarterback can take before he becomes a multi-millionaire ‘vegetable’?

  2. Designated2 says:

    Link arms now, spooning later.

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